Well woke up this morning and still half sleeping  I vaguely recalled a conversation between my daughter ( Autumn ) and wife (Simone). I can’t remember much of the conversation but I did hear hair mentioned and a shopping list being put together. The plan was to purchase a list of items which would enhance and make Autumn’s hair grow longer, stronger and healthier. There were also a number of vitamins  and other beauty products.

Getting random  shopping lists is a regular   occurrence with a teenage daughter and I though nothing more until the wife showed me the list – which I have scanned and posted below……

Now I’m no expert , but I was still  rather surprised and slightly worried to see item number nine  on the list , under the heading “food & drink”

Oysters…

OYSTER ?

I mean is she going to eat them ?  or does she have to wash her hair in them. Do  they have to be a particular breed of Oyster or will any do?  ?

And are there more than one type of Oyster available to purchase?

As these questions drifting about my mind I tried to recall my lifetime knowledge of Oysters and I’m afraid that it only amounted to a distasteful memory of eating something that was cold , slimy and felt similar to swallowing (and I feel sick even saying this) a mouthful of Phlegm. Not that I’ve ever swallowed a mouthful of phlegm, I assure you.

Scanning the rest of column one everything else seemed to a reasonable request and I moved onto the second column. All was going well and fitting in with the “hair” and healthy living theme until I came to the last item on the list.

Spongbob Square Pants ?

Well you could have blown me over with a feather.

She’s 16 years old and is dating her first serious (not in my eyes) boyfriend and all her time, energy and daily moods swings are dependent  on  this relationship running smoothly – Which I am sad to admit is not always the case.

I’m starting to depress myself now – so I’ll just go along with the list and make  a fatherly contribution to my beautiful daughters emotional wellbeing. Because – I know if I don’t get everything on the list I’ll be in for a hissy fit and dirty looks over  the dinning table.

Now then  , where do I buy Oysters?